I’m petrified of spiders. No Joke. I think that’s why I have a spider episode in a LOT of my books. I’m on spider alert constantly. It is very common for me to gasp and the family to hear, “Oh, I thought it was a spider sorry.”
When I read this excerpt to the husband, he said, “No one will believe that this is real unless they live with you.” Truth.
And the part about the little dead body–that happened to me just a year and a half ago in a bed and breakfast in Amsterdam. I swear I didn’t sleep well for easily six months.
Anyway, enjoy this funny excerpt! And if you haven’t read Desiring the Forbidden or pre-ordered His Sassy Girl yet, I’ll have links attached to the covers below
He opened the door and stepped into his entryway, only to see a shoe hurtling toward him at high velocity. Fortunately, his quick reflexes saved him, his heavy sneaker bouncing off his raised forearm. “Shit, woman, what the fuck are you doing?”
“It’s huge, Daddy. You have to kill it. Kill it now!” She rushed at him throwing her arms around his waist.
Cade’s eyes darted around the room.
Was there an intruder? Did someone break in? Was it one of the rape gangs? Did he make his girl stand naked and the enemy was in their midst?
Cade whispered, “Where are they baby? Tell Daddy.”
She pulled away, her eyebrows knitted in confusion. “They who?”
Now they were both confused. “What are you talking about, Sunni? You said it was huge and you’re throwing things. Obviously there must be an intruder.” Cade pushed Sunni behind him, carefully and quietly walked to the hallway, pulling his gun out of his gun belt.
[pullquote align=”left” cite=”” link=”” color=”” class=”” size=””]“Daddy. No! It’s a spider.” Madison pointed at a huge black, furry spider climbing up the wall by the front door. [/pullquote]
“Oh Jesus! You have to kill him. Hurry! Before he runs away. If he runs away, we’ll have to sleep in the truck.” She was dancing on her tiptoes, beside herself watching the spider inch his way up the yellow wall.
“You almost clocked me in the head with my own shoe and scared ten years off my life for a fucking spider? Madison Anne, we will work on this fear. This is just silly. It’s a spider, not an intruder. You scared me to death.” He grabbed a piece of paper off the coffee table, walking up the furry insect, who he had no doubt was more afraid than the two of them put together, sliding his furry body onto the paper and tossing it out the front door.
“Oh my God! Please don’t tell me you just threw him out the door so he can torture us in our sleep. Spiders crawl up your body, you know!
[pullquote align=”full” cite=”” link=”” color=”” class=”” size=””]They have done studies that show they climb into your mouth while you’re sleeping, or bite you, resulting in sepsis. Do you know that you put us all at risk?[/pullquote]
“Did you even think about the danger you’ve put us in when we’re sleeping and unaware?” Her voice was shrieking and not in disrespect, but in absolute and total fear.
“Madison Anne. This is ridiculous. I know you’re afraid, but spiders don’t spend their day trying to figure out how to torture human beings. Trust me on this. That little guy was petrified and very happy to be in the rosebushes again.” He walked up to her, stroking her back lightly.
She shrugged him off. “How would you know? How do you know what a spider thinks or doesn’t think? Have you ever killed a spider on your chest in your sleep, felt his little legs sliding and breaking free of the body, leaving remnants across your chest? Have you?”
The girl looked to be on the verge of hysteria. He tilted her chin up, kissing her mouth gently. “Madison, this is enough. The spider is gone. We won’t be discussing this anymore until you are calm. Maybe you need to type a paper on the benefits of spiders for me tomorrow. I think you’d learn a lot from an assignment like that.”
“I’d like to see you try to make me do that.” She swallowed loudly when he raised his eyebrows at her impertinence.
“Unless you want two spankings tonight, I suggest you rephrase that statement.”
Her lips were pursed and she grit her teeth, glaring at him. [pullquote align=”left” cite=”” link=”” color=”” class=”” size=””]“I’m not doing it. I don’t like spiders and I refuse.” [/pullquote]
She crossed her arms over her chest, the nonverbal communication that she was closing herself off, keeping him away.
Like he’d ever allow that. “Wrong answer!” Thankfully, he had required that she be naked except for the ruffled white apron. The top of the apron only covered the center of her breast, the nipples bracing the edges of the yoke like they were push pins. He couldn’t focus on that now. He bent her over, tucking her to his hips while she screeched, stamping her feet on the floor.
“You aren’t allowed to stomp your feet like a two year old.” He smacked the back of her thighs — hard, the tender white skin turning a bright pink in short order. He continued to slap the area, not leaving any spaces untouched.
He didn’t stand her quite upright, instead, holding her tightly. “Are you done with your little fit?”
“All right, now let’s deal with your defiance and disrespect.”
I hope you enjoyed it! If you would like to read more — click on the book covers below. I’ll be doing more posts this coming week.